INTOLERANT INDIAN!

I am such f***king intolerant Indian (Read as Liberal Hindu-Muslim) that :
1) I watch SRK movies just to laugh at the Muslim guy playing a Hindu character who steals the Girl away from another Muslim/Sikh/Christian guy (see that's how u watch a movie as per the shastras)
2) whenever a rickshaw wala refuses me a ride, I burn his rickshaw down

3) I celebrate religious festivals like Eid and Christmas, so that I can make them look bad and eat up all the food on the table.
4) I use Sahitya Academy awards as book cases for my Vedas,Purans,Manusmrutis,Kurans,Mithun Chakravarthy, MSG movies and Radhe Radhe dance loop DvD's.
5) I buy music of Ghulam Ali,Begum Akhtar,Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan,etc just to deprive some Pakistani off it
6) I Ridicule the media for being balanced; I mean they show Fortune tellers and God's miracles in the morning and talk about superstition in the evening debates.Bastards!
7) I shoot rationalists and anti religion commentators on a monthly basis as that's a part of my teachings from home,school,books and the secret pro Brahmin Neo nazi Demi Rasputin organization I belong to....Hail Bhadrakali!
8) Vande Matram is a cryptic mass hypnosis mantra which will convert minorities to Hinduism the minute they say it.
9) Every time I embrace a Muslim friend, I am actually practicing Shivaji Maharaj's tiger claw technique
10) Every-time I speak out how wrongly my religion has been portrayed,drawn or interpreted, a movie,book,actress or artist becomes world famous and global!
11) All my Cargos,capris and brown color pants are camouflage over my RSS khaki shorts.
12) I get people of low status locked up in my basement as my forefathers have been claimed to do (sources unknown)
13) Dandiya & Dhol in Navratri & Ganpati is Morse code and that's how the saffron terrorism communicates plus Diwali crackers is the master plan of global destruction....wuuuhhaaaahahahaha!!
14) I only take Right turns never a Left turn and I only go 'straight'!
15) i eat secularism for breakfast,liberalism for lunch and athesim for dinner! burp! Today is 'Upwaas' so you are lucky, you can read this today.... bench-chor!
16) finally I support PM Modi and I think he is the best thing to happen to modern Indian politics and INDIA! There will be screws in the party but there is hope too.....lets give it a chance! There I have said it!! I am now indeed an Intolerant Indian or you have not believed me for last 15 points!!................(to be taken with anti satire salts)................‪#‎आहेतेआहे‬ ‪#‎aaheteaahe‬ (Copyright-Rohan Mankani)

Everyone has an opinion

Everyone has an opinion….In fact we have too many opinions….everyone has a right, everyone has an opinion and everyone wants to be heard…and if you do not hear the opinion I have, then you are my enemy or if I do not agree or believe in yours then, I will make sure your opinion is ridiculed or destroyed….my opinion cannot be your opinion even if there is a greater good at large , I rather stick to my opinion then live peacefully with yours or I will make sure that you do not live peacefully even when your opinion was approved….If my opinion is less heard, I will make sure that I round up a thousand of those who share my opinion and drown the voice of yours or I will go on air, social media, television and wherever possible to make sure that everyone hears me more and your opinion is ignored…my opinion is Communist…your opinion is Capitalist ….his opinion is Right winged….her opinion is sexist…Their opinion is Unnatural…the Khaps the only one with the opinion …our opinion is still in discussion at the Parliament…we will never let their opinion be passed in this session….it’s smart to invest an opinion in the right party at the right time…my leader will decide Our opinion…this opinion has been given by the prophet in the book of opinions……I am reporting this opinion live from the person dying of thirst….her opinion was stripped and raped….their opinion was she is a whore and a plaything…collectively the opinion is that the Government should do something about it…our opinion can be manipulated or bought by the highest bidder…the words in Our reporting are your well Paid opinions…this is not a bribe this is a way for me to see your opinion…my opinion is we should do a dharna for our opinions…..a new demand is that the Upanishads be renamed to Opinionishads….they also demand that their state be divided so that people with likeminded opinions can have a state of their own…Gajendra has no opinion on World Cinema but under qualified students have an opinion on his Career Graph...

Maharashtrians have no opinion in Belgaon…

Hindus have no opinion in Kashmir….

Muslims have no opinion in Jammu…

Parsi’s have no opinion and option in marriage…

Sikhs are joked as an opinion...

Seven Sisters have no opinion on the mainland….Bangladeshis have no opinion in Bangladesh…USA wants a profitable and strong opinion in Pakistan-India-Israel-Rest of the world with oil wells…Palestinians and Jews want to bomb each other’s opinions…Europe is all about the Unions opinion and Greece is all about public opinion….Australia cares for Everyone’s opinion or else why would they say ‘whats up , mate ?’ everytime!….A chaos of opinions in play yet we all are talking ,expressing and reaching nowhere……reason is….. Everyone has an opinion….infact we have too many opinions…..but then again this is just my opinion.

तुमच्या भागातला किंवा ओळखीचा माज करणारा,atittude दाखवणारा,शायनिंग करणारा,मंडळासाठी वर्गणी मागणारा,उठ सुठ flex लावणारा आणि तुम्हाला एरवी कधी न ओळख दाखवणारा "सामाजिक कार्यकर्ता" किंवा "नेता नसून कार्यकर्ता" जेंव्हा तुम्हाला रोज मेसेज किंवा whatsapp forward नित्यनियमाने करायला लागतो तेव्हा समजून घ्या कि 'तो' येत्या 'निवडणुकीला' उभा राहणार आहे!!